Cockney rhyming slang for a row or argument.
They were shouting and screaming at each other – a real bull and cow.
The United Kingdom.
Mostly in the UK, but occasionally elsewhere too.
A fist, as used in a fight.
Punch me would you? How’d you like a bunch of fives in your eye?
The United Kingdom.
Mostly in the UK, but occasionally elsewhere too.
Nonsense.
He says he has invented a perpetual motion machine, which is clearly a load of cobblers.
The United Kingdom.
Widely used, especially in the UK. Slang and borderline swearing – not one for your Grandma.
A more emphatic version of ’Absolutely’.
Would I like to borrow your new Maserati for a day? Abso-bloody-lutely I would!
The United Kingdom – 20th century.
Mainly in the UK.
Ruined or shambolic.
I put in tablespoons instead of teaspoons and my cake recipe has gone all to cock.
Britain. A variant of ‘cocked up’, which is of mid-20th century origin.
Predominantly Britain.
1. A cat that lives wild in a town. 2. Slang term for a prostitute.
1. Those alley cats were screeching and chasing rats in the yard all night. 2. Jack’s getting to be a sex addict. He spends all his time with bimbos and alley cats.
USA, 20th century.
Mostly USA
A slang term for small child.
Janice is pregnant again. With the twins still only two there’s soon going to be three ankle biters around the place.
USA, 19th century.
Cockney rhyming slang for stairs.
Time for bed Jimmy – get yourself up the apples and pears.
Mostly Britain.
Not facing reality; in a dream world.
She says she is going to star in Johnny Depp’s next movie. If you ask me, she’s away with the fairies.
From the Celtic folk belief in fairies.
In Ireland, but also spreading to other countries.
Someone who enters into an amorous relationship with a much younger person.
Jerry Lee Lewis never really recovered from being labelled a baby snatcher after he married his 13 year old cousin.
Cockney rhyming slang for hair.
I’m not sure about that new hairdresser – he cut my barnet much too short.
Mostly Britain.
Slang term for a homosexuality.
If Julian didn’t want us to know he was batting from the pavilion end he shouldn’t keep wearing those lilac loafers.
Britain, 20th century. An allusion to the game of cricket.
An open-handed slap in the face intended to be humiliating.
He wasn’t worth the respect of a punch. Bitch-slapping was more humiliating.
USA, late 20th century.
Widely used, but mainly amongst the young.
Cockney rhyming slang for sister.
There were five of us at home – three brothers and two blood blisters.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for fart.
Not good timing – we were sitting at the table when Granny said grace and he let go a raspberry.
Cockney rhyming slang for face.
Stupid am I! Look into my boat and say that again!
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for arse.
He slipped on those wet leaves by the gate. Legs in the air and landed on his bottle.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for pissed.
Two bottles of wine at home and then four pints in the pub – he was totally Brahms by ten-o-clock.
Mostly Britain.
Extremely cold weather. The full expression is ‘Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey’.
The weatherman says minus 10 degrees and strong winds for tomorrow. That’s brass monkey weather.
The UK and USA in the early 20th century.
Worldwide, mostly among people in their 20/40s, as a slang expression.
Cockney rhyming slang for facts.
I’m telling you brass tacks mate. Florida is bigger than England.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for daughter.
The girls got into trouble but her mother and I still love them – they are our bricks and mortars after all.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for queer (i.e. homosexual).
Quite appropriate that James lives with Julian in Brighton – they are Brighton Pier after all.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for dead.
That bird just landed on the live power cable. He’s brown bread for sure.
Mostly Britain.
Trapped by an opponent in a situation you can’t escape.
I knew he had been stealing but he was the boss’s son. If I said anything he would get me sacked – he had me by the short and curlies.
Britain, late 19th century. People assume this expression has a vulgar origin but, in fact, when coined the hairs referred to were those on the back of the neck.
Of a man pursuing women.
Jack is a borderline sex addict. He’s certainly always chasing the tail.
Cockney rhyming slang for pipe.
Get me twenty cigarettes while you are out would you? – and some tobacco for my cherry ripe.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for mate.
We’ve been friends since school, haven’t we my old china?
Mostly Britain.
women forced into sexual slavery by the Japanese in WWII.
The Japanese called their prostitutes comfort women – nothing comfortable for them I think.
WWII
Cockney rhyming slang for knackered. – note, when this term was coined, cream crackers were a popular snack in the UK.
That’s an hour on the exercise bike. I can’t do any more – I’m crackered.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for sun.
It’s rained every day for ages. I can’t remember the last time I saw the currant bun.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for boots.
I can’t get them on. Either my feet have got bigger or these daisies have shrunk.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for shirt.
Jane’s wedding today. I’ll need a newly pressed dickie dirt for that.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for telephone.
I need to talk to Jackie. Get her on the dog and bone for me would you?
Mostly Britain.
1. Cockney rhyming slang for ears. 2. A very long time.
1. Prince Charles has a fine pair of donkeys. 2. This is the first school reunion we’ve had since 1982. I haven’t seen some of these people in donkey’s years.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for drunk.
He’s been in the bar since we opened six hours ago. It’s fair to assume that he’s totally elephants by now.
Mostly Britain.
An imaginary double, humorously referred to in order to explain the uncharacteristic bad behaviour of a normally moral person. Usually used light-heartedly. The expression formed as an allusion to plots in films involving actual evil twins.
Jane’s such a good girl and I took it as read that she would come to the wedding dressed appropriately, but she’s turned up in full goth makeup. At first I thought it must have been her evil twin.
USA, 2004.
Worldwide, but mostly amongst the young and hip.
A downmarket cinema – allegedly verminous.
When we were kids we used to go to the local flea pit every saturday to watch B-movies.
Britain, mid 20th century.
Cockney rhyming slang for road.
Hurry up and move the car – I can see a traffic warden coming just down the frog and toad.
Mostly Britain.
A mental hospital.
Sadly, Jack was so psychotic they had to take him to the funny farm.
A person who adopts a deliberately androgynous appearance, by use of uni-sex make-up, hair-style and clothing. Probably influenced by ‘bender’ being an earlier slang term for homosexual.
With his eye-liner and lurex catsuits, David Bowie was the archetype gender bender.
USA, 1970s.
Cockney rhyming slang for daft.
That handstand on the window ledge. You could say he was brave or you could say he was George Raft.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for queer.
Julian is ginger – and I don’t mean that he’s got red hair.
Mostly Britain.
A very small (imaginary) unit of measurement.
I was lucky to survive – the bullets were flying everywhere. One missed me by a gnat’s bollock.
Britain, 20th century.
Mostly Britain.
Become excessively agitated and excited.
John had been promised the job. He went ape shit when he found out it went to one of his subordinates.
Originally USA (as ‘go ape’). Britain, 1950s (as ‘go ape shit’). Derived from the habit of apes of throwing faeces at adversaries when agitated.
Worldwide, but not in polite company.
A small cheap cafe selling fried food.
We had been driving all night. A fried breakfast in a greasy spoon was just what I fancied.
USA, 20th century.
Cockney rhyming slang for neck.
It’s freezing out there. Better get a scarf round your Gregory if you’re going out.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for pinch.
It’s hopeless – whenever I try to start a DIY job I find that someone has half-inched some of my tools.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for look.
Now madam, have a Captain Cook at these men and point out the one who attacked you.
Mostly Britain.
1. A choice forced upon someone. 2. Cockney rhyming slang for voice.
1. There was only one room left in the hotel when we arrived, so we got Hobson’s choice. 2. I’ve had a sore throat for a couple of days – now I’m beginning to lose my hobsons.
Britain, 17th century. Derived from the name of the carrier Thomas Hobson.
Worldwide, although mostly amongst the older generation.
An expression of extreme surprise or disbelief.
Two lottery wins in our street in one week! Holy shit – that’s next to impossible.
Mostly USA.
To be easily successful, especially concerning sex or romance.
Since he had that lottery win and the nose job, he’s in like Flynn with the girls.
USA, 1940s.
Worldwide, but more common in the USA than elsewhere.
Cockney rhyming slang for gone wrong.
I thought I could make mayonnaise with butter. When I tried it all went Pete Tong.
Britain, alluding to the popular DJ Pete Tong.
Mainly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for dancing.
Julie wants me to go with her to the ballroom for a night of Jack Palancing.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for car.
Check my new Audi. Its the best jam jar I’ve ever owned.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for piddle.
Now kids, this is going to be a long car trip and we don’t want to be stopping every five minutes. Just go and have a Jimmy before we set off.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for arse.
That was really insulting to my mother. When he bends over he’s going to get a good kick up the khyber.
Mainly Britain. Note that the original pronunciation of ‘pass’ would have been ‘parse’, to rhyme with ‘arse’. This reflects the ‘long r’ vocalisation of Cockneys. Current pronunciation depends on where you come from
Die.
Grandad kicked the bucket last week. No real surprise – he was 96.
Britain – 18th century.
Sexual intercourse between two people standing up.
They had nowhere to go to make love and had to resort to a knee-trembler in the alley.
Britain, 19th century.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for head.
Betting your wages on the toss of a coin isn’t the best way to get out of debt – use your loaf mate.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for bed.
The hamster escaped and the cat got it – it’s Lord Fred for sure.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for eyes.
If that traffic warden comes back let me know – keep your minces open will you?
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for deaf.
You have to shout – he’s almost completely mutton.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for duchess.
This year will be our silver wedding, the old dutch and me.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for mate.
We’ve been best pals since schooldays. He’s my best china plate.
Mostly Britain.
The inadvertent exposure of a womans nipple.
Wearing a low cut dress like that, a nip slip was almost inevitable.
USA, late 20th century.
Mostly USA and UK and not amongst the older generations.
The important aspects of a situation; the heart of the matter.
The solicitor spent ages listing the business details of Grandad’s will. We were all waiting for him to get to the nitty-gritty when we found out how much money we would inherit.
USA, mid 20th century.
Cockney rhyming slang for mouth.
No, it’s true! I heard it straight from her own north and south.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for alone.
The others have all gone out – I’m on my tod.
Origin uncertain – possibly related to the US jockey Tod Sloan.
Excellent; wonderful.
Wow, that 20-year old whiskey is peachy keen..
USA, mid-20th century.
Mostly USA.
Cockney rhyming slang for stink.
That drain cover should be an airtight seal but it’s broken. There’s a real pen and ink in here.
Mostly Britain.
Spoil a photograph by unexpectedly appearing in the picture and taking the attention away from the intended subject – usually as a prank.
Jack is so annoying. We were all posed for my graduation picture and he photobombed us wearing a pink cowboy hat.
USA, early 21st century.
A recent derivation, not yet taken up by the older generations.
Cockney rhyming slang for feet.
I knew I shouldn’t have agreed to help with the Christmas post. Ten miles up and down stairs today – my plates are killing me.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for lies.
You can’t trust what he tells you – half of his stories are porkies.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for cold.
Whoa, it’s the coldest day of the winter so far – really taters.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for talk.
He just goes on and on about his hobbies – rabbit, rabbit, rabbit!
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for tea.
Put the kettle on would you? I’d love a nice cup of rosie lea.
Mainly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for curry.
Every Friday night after work, the lads all pile into the Star of India for a ruby.
Mostly Britain.
A reference to an inept or undesirable person or thing.
Since the coal mines and steelworks have closed many places in the Rust Belt have become real sad-ass towns.
USA, mid-20th century.
Mainly USA.
Cockney rhyming slang for go.
The police are on there way. With your record they are bound to think the fight was your fault – you’d better scarper before they get here.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for fake.
That picture was supposed to be by Monet but there was a mobile phone in the background – I knew right away it was a sexton.
Mostly Britain.
Jokey term for the early morning.
I know we have to get the early flight but isn’t 2am too soon to be getting up? It isn’t even sparrow fart yet.
Britain, 19th century. Originally an example of rural slang.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for wig.
That thatch on Donald Trump’s head – it has to be a syrup.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for look.
There’s a triple rainbow over there. If you don’t believe me take a butchers yourself.
Mainly Britain
Cockney rhyming slang for thief.
Just be careful to keep your purse safe when you go down to the market – there are plenty of tea leaves ready to steal it.
Mostly Britain.
1. An expression of sympathy. 2. Said of something that the speaker rates very lowly.
1. I heard that your child has leukaemia. That sucks – I’m so sorry. 2. His singing is out of tune and he just can’t dance. The whole performance sucks.
Mostly USA, bit spreading Worldwide in recent years.
A small and usually insignificant factor (or person) dominates over one that is normally more powerful and influential.
Even small countries like Estonia have a veto in European Union voting and can’t be over-ruled. I’d call that the tail wagging the dog.
USA, 1870s.
Promiscuous woman.
She’s been with every boy in the neighbourhood – they even call her the town bike.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for hat.
It looks like rain – I think I’ll need a coat and my titfer.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for wife.
Twenty years we’ve been married now, the trouble and strife and myself.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for state.
His clothes were awry and he’d lost one of his shoes – he was in a right two and eight.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for sick.
Sorry, I won’t be into work today. I’ll feeling Uncle Dick.
Mostly Britain.
In serious difficulty, with no hope of respite.
We were halfway across the Australian outback when we realised our water bottle had leaked. We really were up shit creek.
USA, 1890s. Note: Shit creek isn’t a real place.
Think smart.
Sending money to that Nigerian email scam. Use your loaf, mate – wasn’t it obvious it was a con?
Britain, mid-20th century.
Worldwide, but most commonly in Britain.
Relax in a slothful manner, usually watching tv while lying on a sofa – (that is, become a ‘couch-potato’).
Such a stressful time at work this week. Come Friday night all I was good for was to veg out binge watching Friends.
Britain, late 20th century.
Worldwide, but most commonly restricted to the under 40s.
Referring to an item of clothing slipping out of place to expose part of the body.
Her top slipped down in front of the boys. She said it was a wardrobe malfunction but I think it was deliberate.
USA. First said by Justin Timberlake to explain the inadvertent exposure of Janet Jackson’s breast during the half-time show at the 2004 Super Bowl.
Cockney rhyming slang for suit.
That important interview is coming up next week. I think I ought to get a new whistle.
Mostly Britain.
Cockney rhyming slang for would you believe it?
Amazing – he hit double top six times with six darts. Would you Adam and Eve it?
Mostly Britain.
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