Re: My favorite sign
Posted by Word Camel on March 18, 2002 In Reply to: Re: Tattoos posted by ESC
on March 18, 2002
: : : : : From a story in The Courier Journal, Louisville, Ky.,
March 18, 2002.
: : : : : CRUTCH PHRASES:
: : : : : ".Thank you for your patience.
: : : : : And . . . have a nice day.
: : : : : The shopworn phrases above are agonizingly familiar to
anyone who routinely suffers through less-than-stellar customer
service, which is most of us. What's so annoying is not the sentiment
-- patience is a virtue, wishing someone a nice day is a nice gesture.
: : : : : What's so grating is the way they're said, often dripping
with monotonal insincerity, indifference and even the occasional
touch of sarcasm. So is the suspicion, often justified, that these
customer service 'crutch phrases' actually mask bigger problems
within the company: a misguided attempt to save money -- or boost
profits -- by skimping on the customer."
: : : : : There is a a sidebar by Bill Lampton, author of "The
Complete Communicator," with several responses to "Thank you for
your patience." Examples:
: : : : : It seems you have misread my emotions. Please don't let
my calm appearance fool you. I ran out of patience with this problem
a long time ago.
: : : : : Let me clarify something. The only reason I may seem
to be patient is because I have vowed not to be as rude to you as
people in your business have been to me.
: : : : : Patient? I don't think you have pinpointed my emotion
exactly. You'd be more accurate if you said I seem calm and serene.
I really am. Why? Because I know this is my last day of shopping
with you.
: : : : : A link to an article by Mr. Lampton:
: : : : : Words We'd Love to Do Without at http://www.businessknowhow.com/manage/words.htm
: : : : Well, how about signs? Thank You for Not Smoking. I see
it everywhere. Thank You for Not Eating Our Soup with Your Hands
and Then Tossing the Bowl at the Busboy. I fear the day when "Will
the defendant please rise" is replaced by "Thank you for not sitting."
: : : : The fish counter at my local supermarket often labels some
of its offerings Thawed for Your Convenience. That's euphemispeak
for This Fish Was Frozen.
: : : That's food for thawed.
: : My personal all-time favourite... seen outside a US-Mall based
ophthalmologist...
: : "Your eyes tested FREE while U wait"
: : ...and the alternative would presumably be to leave your eyes
there to be tested while you go shopping...
: Along the same lines, a bumpersticker: Tattoos while you wait
was displayed on the streets of New York City in the 80's while
Ed Koch was in power. A small ordinary looking blue and white street
sign read "Litter is filthy and disgusting so don't do it. I could
almost hear Ed Koch saying the words...
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