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New Joisey jokes

Posted by Smokey Stover on November 04, 2004

In Reply to: New Joisey jokes posted by Brian from Shawnee on November 04, 2004

: : : : : : : : : : : :
: : : : : : : : : : : : The Silver Swan who, living, had no note,
: : : : : : : : : : : : When death approached, unlocked her silent throat.
: : : : : : : : : : : : Leaning her breast against the reedy shore,
: : : : : : : : : : : : Thus sung her first and last,
: : : : : : : : : : : : And sung no more:

: : : : : : : : : : : : "Farewell all joys, O death come close mine eyes.
: : : : : : : : : : : : More geese than swans now live, more fools than wise."

: : : : : : : : : : : :
: : : : : : : : : : : : Need I say more? SS

: : : : : : : : : : : You might say it is an Orlando Gibbons composition.

: : : : : : : : : : I might say that, but it might imply that Gibbons was the author of the poem. He set it to music as a madrigal, published in 1601, but no one seems to know who wrote the words. And it is the words that express the sentiments, among others, that I feel today (November 3). SS

: : : : : : : : : Did you know we have black swans down here. Completely irrelevant, but I thought I'd mention it. And they're stunning too.

: : : : : : : : I think 1612 is more accurate for the publication date. There's a great recording by the Hilliard Ensemble that I have on this computer, so I think I'll listen to it.
: : : : : : : : Ah.

: : : : : : : Bob, you are so right about the date of publication. It was indeed 1612. SS

: : : : : : Goddess, as a resident of New Jersey (laugh if you will) I know about black swans. There's a small lake, part of a local park, near Cape May, which is visited by numerous birds, like the loon that I saw there, and numerous humans, some of whom get great enjoyment from bringing cracked corn to feed the ducks. The black swans are a permanent ornament, imported from Australia (where else?). A few years ago a couple of boys killed one of the swans, and there was a local uproar. The boys' parents had to pay the cost of importing another swan, and presumably the boys learned their lesson. But truthfully I don't know what lesson they may have learned. Crime and punishment are what they like to call a "vexed problem." One thing for sure, the human users of the lake were vexed as hell. SS

: : : : : Black swans are native to Western Australia, in the area near Perth. The Swan River was explored by the Dutch and they were attacked by these black swans, which are said to have a dreadful disposition. The swan attacks, along with an island full of little rodents the Dutch thought were rats, just off the coast, persuaded the Dutch they didn't want anything to do with Australia.
: : : : : Thanks to the swans, we can talk to the Goddess in English.

: : : : Haha - shame I can only talk back in Australian hey???

: : : : It's right the black swans are supposed to be native to Western Australia - but they're migratory to some degree and there are plenty over this side of Oz too and the middle bit as well - so I'm not sure who decides from where they originate. Ward, I think the little rodents you're talking about a Quokkas. See link below. They're cute as hell and all over Rottnest Island, off the Western Australian coast. I might add, for anyone thinking to venture to this fair land for a holiday, if you go to Western Australia, Rottnest Island is gorgeous, the water is pristine, there are no cars allowed so the quokkas are quite friendly, as they're totally protected and safe and it's definitely worth a visit.

: : : : As for the black swan's temperant - I'd like to know what those Dutch men were doing. I've spent quite some time with black swans and the only time they even looked like having a go at me was when I looked like going near their eggs.

: : : : And finally Smokey - why would we laugh at the fact that you live in New Jersey? Is this an in joke in the U.S.? I once visited New Jersey (to be honest it wasn't intentional, I got lost), BUT I'm so glad I did, because I loved it.

: : : Sorry, here it is

: : My darling friend and I shared a bottle of Australian Black Swan Merlot the other evening. Not bad!

: Yes, Goddess, saying "New Jersey" while rolling your eyes is an in-joke in the U.S., especially on the East Coast. On the famous Saturday Night Live comedy show about 20 years ago one of the tag lines was "Oh you're from Jersey? What exit?", referring to the criss-crossing highways between the big cities. If you take the New Jersey Turnpike from New York City to Philadelphia you'll see some of the worst urban blight, the smokiest factories, the busiest airports, and the biggest garbage dumps around. And the Sopranos live there, too. Of course if you head to Staten Island or Queens (parts of NYC) or Chester (satellite city of Philly) you'll see the same thing. If you stray off the highway you'll see some beautiful forests, rolling hills, historic sites, and the unique Pine Barrens. Poor New Jersey, the State of my birth and the red-headed stepchild of the North East, is treated like "flyover country"!

Brian, your tempting account of the sights from the Turnpike left out one of the big draws of the trip, namely, the smells. How many highways can boast of being thus perfumed? Well, maybe my enthusiasm is unwarranted--I haven't been on the Turnpike in a while. My usual out-of-state destinations can be reached by way of the Garden State Parkway. (For the uninitiated, New Jersey has a large chemical industry, much of it located within a convenient distance from the Turnpike.) SS

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