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Lawyer jokes

Posted by Legal Beagle on February 27, 2004

In Reply to: Philadelphia Lawyer posted by Henry on February 25, 2004

: : : : : : I've watched Philadelphia (1993, *ing Tom Hanks, Denzel Washington and Antonio Bandares), my all-time favourite movie, a couple of times and have read its script too. But there's this riddle in the movie I didn't quite catch.

: : : : : : At the climax, Andrew Becket (Tom Hanks) poses this riddle to Joe Miller (Denzel Washington), his lawyer who's paying a visit to the hospital to congratulate Andy for his legal victory. Andy asks, "So, what do you call a thousand lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean?" When Joe gives up, Andy divulges, "A good start!"

: : : : : : I just didn't get it. Would someone explain this to me; like I were a six old :-)?

: : : : : It's quite straightforward! Andy would like to get rid of all lawyers. Drowning 1000 is a good start. You can of course adapt this question using the profession of your choice.

: : : : Lawyer jokes are kind of a "tradition." Go to http://www.google.com/ and type in "lawyer jokes" to access a bunch.

: : : : It was so cold today that all the lawyers in town had their hands in their own pockets! Cheers!

: : They used the lawyers in the ocean joke in another movie:

: : What do you call 500 lawyers lying on the bottom of the ocean?
: : A good start...
: : -- (The War of the Roses, 1989)

: Perhaps it was a clever joke in the film Philadelphia. The term "Philadelphia Lawyer" indicates a deviously clever attorney who can twist anything to his client's favor. Woody Guthrie knew of one.

: Philadelphia Lawyer by Woody Guthrie 1937

: Way out in Reno, Nevada, Where romance blooms and fades,
: A great Philadelphia lawyer Was in love with a Hollywood maid.
: "Come, love, and we will wander Down where the lights are bright.
: I'll win you a divorce from your husband, And we can get married tonight."

: Wild Bill was a gun-totin' cowboy, Ten notches were carved in his gun.
: And all the boys around Reno Left Wild Bill's maiden alone.
: One night when he was returning From ridin' the range in the cold,
: He dreamed of his Hollywood sweetheart, Her love was as lasting as gold.

: As he drew near her window, A shadow he saw on the shade;
: 'Twas the great Philadelphia lawyer Makin' love to Bill's Hollywood maid.
: The night was as still as the desert, The moon hangin' high overhead.
: Bill listened awhile to the lawyer, He could hear ev'ry word that he said:

: "Your hands are so pretty and lovely, Your form's so rare and divine.
: Come go with me to the city And leave this wild cowboy behind."
: Now back in old Pennsylvania, Among those beautiful pines,
: There's one less Philadelphia lawyer In old Philadelphia tonight.

for lawyer jokes try nolo.com - most of the classics are there.

people can always ring a comedian when they've not been paid, been run over or unjustly arrested for murder...

[funny how much more people appreciate a lawyer when they're in trouble]