Posted by Word Camel on January 15, 2003
In Reply to: Foul Fortune Cookies posted by R. Berg on January 15, 2003
: : : I'm idly toying with the idea (*very* idly) of setting up a company to manufacture fortune cookies containing wildly cynical but far more applicable mottos than the trite pap usually contained in these after-dinner wastes of space. So far I have a grand total of three mots justes - any other particularly twisted examples would be welcomed.
: : : "Money can't buy you happiness, it's true - but wouldn't you rather be sobbing your heart out in a Lamborghini than on the bus?"
: : : "If you truly love something, let it go free - then just before it gets out of range, if it looks like it's going to keep on going, bring it down with a well-aimed shot."
: : : "Before you criticise a man, walk a mile in his shoes - and only then criticise him. You'll be a whole mile away *and* have stolen the poor sap's shoes, so what's he going to do about it?"
: : By coincidence I have been thinking about this too - probably due to the fact that as a new mommy I am ordering Chinese take away far more often than is probably healthy. I was thinking of something darker, along the lines of. "Things are not always as they seem. Ps. By the way, those things in the sauce that looked like black beans, weren't. "
: Some greeting-card publishers pay for cynical material of that kind. But I'd suggest condensing the slogans you've written. They contain extra words.
Between that and the L@tin tr@nsl@tions we could probably earn enough to take us all to London, including Gary (though it's just a train ride for him). We could sedate those who do not like to fly for the duration of the plane journey (drastic, yes but some occasions are far too good to be missed and need all hands on deck).